Sleep Wars

 First of all, this isn't us...but it could be. I recognize her facial expression. Also: I don't sleep in anything nearly as fetching as that. My nightshirt says: I am here to sleep. Please let me. 

But sleep is a problem. We've worked out an accusation system whereby I accuse my spouse of snoring, and he counters by accusing me of snoring. No one can win a battle based on mutual accusation. So I recorded him last night.

After I had acquired evidence, I turned over and fell asleep, only to be poked on the shoulder moments later, and told "Turn over. You're snoring." I grabbed my phone/video recording and shrieked, "This! This is what YOU do!" (deftly skirting counter accusation). He listened and then said, simply, "That's not me. That's you." I asked him how and why such a preposterous thing could be true. It was dark, but I assume he shrugged. 

So I made another recording. Then another before going back to sleep. Then I felt the poke in the ribs again. I was immediately on guard and accused him of gaslighting me. I threatened to move into the guest room if he persisted. We both faced our respective walls and seethed back to sleep. 

I played the recordings for him again while we were having our coffee this morning. He was unmoved. My triumph fell. We are at an impasse. 

What would the woman in the photo do? What DID she do? Did it end in divorce? Did she smother him with her pillow? Did she smile and say, "Awww. He's sleeping soundly." The latter? Unlikely. I know her expression.